STAR BLOGGERS

The better we get at money-making, the worse we get at baby-making. Updates on Singapore’s low birth rates are like an annual event with a predictable, sad ending. The government has put in various financial and social incentives to try to persuade Singaporeans to procreate. But it seems no matter what they do, the situation just seems to be getting worse each year.

I came from a family of seven siblings, and my husband came from a family of ten. Both of us are also the youngest amongst our siblings. When I recall it, none of my neighbours had any less than four children themselves. It was the traditional set-up of the 1970s: The fathers were the sole breadwinners, and mothers were housewives. We all lived very simply, on hand-me-downs, and most of the elder siblings would set out for the workforce right after completing their O-levels. But growing up in a huge family, in a neighbourhood of huge families, needless to say, was fun.

A couple of times, I’ve been asked the question: Why stop at two? Here’s my point of view:

There are a multitude of reasons why someone who enjoyed growing up in the company of many siblings chooses to have only two of her own. Singapore highly encourages all her citizens to work – to meet the demands of her economy. And even if one chooses not to work, income from a sole breadwinner is limiting, especially with the high costs of all aspects of living, current and future – one of which is educating children.

The nature of Singapore’s society has also changed tremendously. The extended family which provided the support for the care of young children is almost extinct. Instead of a trusted care giver, parents now have to turn to infant-care centres, home helpers – strangers to care for their children. This leaves mothers with guilt – something not many are comfortable with, especially having to do it over and over again.

Thus, to ensure that the children we have been responsible for bringing into this world are provided with at least enough education to survive in it, many women like myself choose to work. Bringing up children without love and attention is of course meaningless. Time with the family is always very limited for the working woman and man. So as not to spread our attention too thin, the solution thus is to have less. Only then can we justify that we have been responsible parents.

So if you ask me: When can we have our 2.1? I’d say, not until we figure out how to have our cake and eat it too. Besides, quality is always better than quantity, right?

Nora Adam is a 37 year old holding a managerial position. In between juggling her job, two hyperative kids, and the dreaded housework, she has completed her post-graduate degree in sociology. And yes, short of having her tubes tied, she is stopping at two.

Think you know much about the various races and religions in Singapore? See if you knew these facts!

1) MP Inderjit Singh belongs to which religious faith?
A: Sikhism

2) If Raju’s mother tongue is Tamil, which region in India do his ethnic origins lie?
A: South India/ Tamil Nadu

3) What does the Deepavali festival celebrate?
A: Triumph of good over evil/ Light over darkness

4) What does the dot on a Hindu’s forehead represent?
A: Their spiritual eye

5) Which animal is considered sacred in Hinduism, and Hindus would not eat its flesh?
A: The cow/ beef

6) At what age are Muslim women required to wear a tudung/ headscarf?
A: When they reach puberty.

7) Why can’t Muslims eat pork and touch dogs?
A: These animals are considered unclean in Islam.

What is the difference between A)Hari Raya Puasa & B) Hari Raya Haji
A: The end of Ramadan/ fasting month
B: To commemorate Prophet Abraham’s sacrifice of Prophet Ishmael to God.

9) What is the meaning of “halal” and “haram”?
A: Allowed/ lawful & Forbidden/ unlawful

10) What is the name and meaning of the handshake that Muslims do when they meet?
A: The Salam. It is a handshake that symbolizes heartfelt greetings.

11) What is the significance of Vesak day?
A: Commemorating Buddha’s life: his birth, enlightenment and entering into nirvana.

12) When eating with a Chinese, why is it considered rude to stick your chopsticks upright in a bowl?
A: Because it resembles joss sticks offerings in an urn.

13) Why is it taboo to use a broom during Chinese New Year?
A: Because it symbolizes sweeping away good luck.

14) Which religion does the oldest temple in Singapore (Thian Hock Keng Temple) adhere/cater to?
A: Taoism

15) Why do the Chinese consider the number 8 auspicious?
A: Because it sounds like the word “prosper” in Cantonese.

16) Do all Indians wash their hair with coconut oil, why do they use it?
A: No. Coconut oil is believed to have medicinal properties, but not all Indians use it.

17) Are all Malays in Singapore Muslims?
A: No. Malay is a race, Islam is a religion. There are Christian & Hindu Malays in Singapore as well.

18) Why do the Chinese say “touch wood” when they speak of negative things eg. death?
A: To ward off bad luck or misfortune. The Gods are believed to reside in trees and therefore touching wood is an action to ask for good luck.

19) Is it true that there is a knife in a Sikh’s turban?
A: No. Sikhs carry a pocket knife as part of the 5 articles of their faith.

20) When a Malay person’s name is Siti Binte Ahmad, why is it wrong to call her Ms Ahmad?
A: Ahmad is her father’s name. You should call her Ms Siti.

21) Can Muslims wear shoes made out of pig skin lining?
A: No. They cannot touch pig products

PLUS, you voted on our poll last night, and here are the results!

QN: Do you think the whole McDonald’s saga was a publicity gimmick?

1. Yes, now everyone will be rushing to buy the pig toy – 59% votes

2. No, it was an honest mistake – 41% votes

“Sentosa confirms that on the night of the said incident, a staff member was alerted to a ‘commotion’ in the party zone. Security personnel were then activated, but the ‘commotion’ had passed when they arrived at the scene. Also, no one has come forward to file a complaint to date, despite the media attention on this incident.

In reviewing the incident, following the release of the YouTube clip, Sentosa can also share that the alleged victim was seen moving around that night with a group. They were all scantily dressed and were entertaining requests for photographs with them. At the time of the said incident, they were seen dancing provocatively on a raised platform.”

Here begins the scapegoating. Us Singaporeans do enjoy a round of well-fired arrows.

In my book, when a girl gets molested, it is more often than not her fault.

Coming from an average, normal, boring and adequately conservative Chinese family, I have always been taught not to invite trouble by dangling myself or any of my more desirable assets in front of salivating, less gentlemanly specimens of the other sex.

This quote I can take no credit for, for they were uttered by the wise and strong woman who gave birth to me. Speaking of which, I neglected to mention that the dynamics of my adequately conservative Chinese family is pretty much ruled by my dominant, and more than occasionally, feminist mother. As a result both my sister and myself have grown up with several key principles at hand:

1. Don’t trust men.

2. If you dress in clothes the size of a dish cloth, it’s your own fault if men aged 8 – 80 stare down your crevices.

3. If you decide to behave like a prostitute, don’t be outraged when you get treated like one.

Harsh words, perhaps. But behind it all my mother was just driving home the point that the one thing a girl cannot afford to lose is her dignity.

A friend of mine once commented, “When a guy gets drunk, it’s just funny. When a girl gets drunk, it’s just downright embarrassing.” We were watching several intoxicated friends making a fool of themselves in public.

It’s true. We easily laugh off the antics of drunk male friends, at least until they puke on our best shirts. But when a drunk female throws herself onto the laps of (un)willing men, half the school will probably find out by the next morning. Throw in the other half of campus and neighbouring universities if her virginity is lost.

I’m not saying that females are necessarily always at fault. Intentional groping incidents that seem to occur every countdown or Christmas prove that some deprived members of the opposite sex really do think only with their dicks. But a girl dressed in a tea towel parading herself before a sea of men at a clubbing event is as good as throwing yourself with your main arteries sliced into a sea of great white sharks. It sends the signal: Come and get me, I’m not going to mind.

Perhaps she threw out the bait a little too far, or threw out a little too much bait. The tuna she’d expected to reel in turned into a crocodile (read: buaya), with nearby strangers capturing her struggle with the over-eager creature on video for the rest of Singapore’s online community to likewise partake in her humiliation.

In that I do offer my sympathies. If I have a finger to blame, it would slowly uncurl towards the people who chose to upload the video to YouTube and pictures to STOMP in the name of ‘righteous anger’. If their intentions were to shame the men, I think they’ve done a better job shaming the woman. If their intention was to shame everyone else for not having gone forward to help, congratulations for having done no different. If it was uploaded for no other reason than to get a good kick out of it, then I rest my case. Us Singaporeans do enjoy having things to make a ruckus about every now and then.

One thing she (or he, as some seem to claim) can be thankful for, is that once this dies down, at least she wouldn’t have gained the notoriety of 2009’s favourite Singaporean – Ris Low.

Elizabeth Lee is a 20-year old student who does not club. She feels that while men almost always seem to bear the brunt of a molest case; she finds it hard to sympathize with the lady in the discussed case.

To all the aggressive and daring ladies out there, here’s an idea:

Why don’t you try to rape a guy, violate him and then file a criminal rape suit against him?
-It’s like double bonuses-

After all, what’s there to worry? The law is made to protect the gentler sex, the ladies.
Ladies-1
Men – 0

It seems that men are always on the losing end of this argument. It seems that the law is really biased against us.
Isn’t the law meant to protect us? If we get raped and bring it to the authorities’ attention, the law ends up harming us? Isn’t this totally ironic?

To my male comrades, all I can say is this:
“Wake up your bloody idea!”

The law is meant to be equitable. It is meant to be fair and without bias.  Given the chances, I think it is quite logical to assume that if one party were to attempt a sexual assault on the other, the man has a smaller chance of becoming a victim.
The woman, on the other hand, has a much higher chance of falling victim to the circumstances. That’s when the law is meant to intervene.

I consider myself a traditional man. I like being a man and I have pride in being a male.  It is because of this that I don’t think we need to resort to the law in protecting our modesty.  A large majority of us probably can defend ourselves from a ravenous female if she attempted to jump on/touch/molest/rape us (unless, we secretly wanted it).

What about the small minority of us that really did get “pwned” by a horny female?

Yes. I admit that the law isn’t fair towards the small minority that are you.

Sigh. But seriously guys… If you were outrun and overpowered by a female to the extent that you were sexually violated, maybe you do deserve to get punished- for being so embarrassingly weak and useless.

Pedro first went “clubbing” when he was in Junior College (around the time he was 17, 18) but he doesn’t do it anymore. He very much prefers “pubbing” to “clubbing” because he finds clubs too noisy, crowded and the music a tad too loud for his liking. Pubs are better in contrast because one can both drink and have a proper conversation with friends

What do I think of the Singapore education system in Chinese? I  think our Chinese is bad, in the same way our English is, only perhaps worse. Singaporeans are effectively illiterate in two languages – in English as well as Chinese. In my daughter’s spelling and dictation list, there was a sentence that read “His crimson red blood spilled out” Come on lah, crimson is already red, it’s like saying “violet purple” or “more faster”.

 
The latter is something you would know if your English is middling, but “crimson red”, only if it is fairly good. So, and here is my point about Chinese, our Chinese is mainly only good enough to recognize the “more faster” kind of error (level 1) as opposed to “crimson red” level 2. Eg, we often see “播电话” whereas it should be 拨 .  For the Chinese (ie from China or Taiwan) it would be a level 1 error but for us, it would be level 2 (I think)

 
The fact that I am typing this in English of course, shows that my Chinese is too awful to be used, even for blogging.  I have three kids in the education system.  I would be happy if their Chinese were good enough so that they can recognize level 1 errors as a matter of course and level 2 ones if they pay sufficient attention.

 
My three suggestions for schools:
1.       Pinyin is a crutch. We ought to start the kids on recognizing words, and we ought to do that from kindergarten.  In Primary One, kids start their Chinese with Pinyin. I am not sure that this is the best way because it makes Chinese derivative.
2.       We ought to take the same care for Chinese that we do for English – this means, having Chinese books easily and cheaply available, and encouraging more school book stores to stock these.
3.       We ought to have more exchange and immersion programmes with China. Eg, for many primary school parents, there is no way for us to send our kids to China for three weeks into a local school there, outside of our children’s schools planning such programmes. Why doesn’t the MOE tie up with some primary schools there and have an open admission – where any parent from any school can sign up?

 
Leong Ching is a former broadcast and newspaper journalist and a mother of three children aged 9,7 and 5.

Whenever I try starting a conversation with a stranger, my greatest fear is that they reply with the following;

讲中文吗？

You speak chinese?

Not too difficult a question, but it always poses a huge dilemma. Should I attempt to communicate in a language of which my mastery would be generously described as ‘mediocre’, or admit to a stranger my lacklustre control of my ‘mother tongue’?

Usually, I swallow my pride and reveal my ineptitude, because the alternative would be a conversation full of guesswork, clarifications, English spillovers and embarrassment.

What happened to bilingualism?

I did my time as the Ministry of Education decreed. I breezed through countless Chinese tests and examinations, memorising thousands upon thousands of Chinese characters and their uses. I wrote essays, deciphered lengthy passages and discerned meaning from convoluted phrases. So why then, a scant 3 years after my last Chinese examination, have I lost my Mandarin?

Here’s the thing; I never had it.

A kid from an English speaking family, in an English speaking school, surrounded by English speaking friends and teachers, how much use did my Chinese get?

Let me give you a hint : None.

Yes, Chinese lessons were the hour a so each day dedicated to the language, but everyone got by with the simple context mastered in childhood, interspersed with English to fill the gaps in their mastery. For the tests and examinations, we pored through the vocabulary lists with single minded intensities,  committing vast quantities of information into short term memory. Alas, after said examinations, we gladly let the language slide back into oblivion. You know how a child, after learning a new word, uses it in every sentence? He tries it on for size, finds where it fits in a sentence, and soon after pieces it into his long term memory.

However, for a kid from an English speaking family, in an English speaking school, surrounded by English speaking friends and teachers, does he go through the same process? No, Chinese is denied the same treatment that a toddler would grant his words, simply because there is no need for it in the current educational atmosphere.

So what CAN be done? How can we reverse the trend of our neglected Mother Tongue?

If I knew the answer, I’d probably be the Minister of Education. All I know is, bilingualism has to start with the young, and without a sustained presence in throughout our lives, will likely be lost far more quickly than it was learned.

English-speaking Chinese boy David Ang has just completed his International Baccalaureate studies at the Anglo-Chinese International School in 2009. The 20 year-old is moving on to do his medical studies at Newcastle University.

As a former contestant of Singapore Idol, one could say life is grand. I occasionally get recognized in the street, receive a two word introduction of myself at any party and helps grease the wheels of my career in media. However, there is an aspect of being a contestant of Singapore Idol that accords me with an unparalleled view of things that no other Singaporean has.

We see what happens behind the scenes. In fact, I have always found it exciting to be the fly on the wall, hanging out with the camera crew, spying on the production team as they switch live from commercials to the actual show, sitting in the make up rooms as everyone spends hours on hair and false eyelashes, trying to get into our racks of costumes while lost in out own little worlds of lyrics and choreography. You see, this is the Singapore Idol that the audience doesn’t see. What Singapore sees on television is a carefully orchestrated music show that is timed to the second while the reality of it all is far from the truth.

Having been through the punishing schedules of last season’s idol, I found it very interesting to see this year’s batch of contestants around Mediacorp, reliving the dream. I remember walking past the TV studios where the top 100 were being whittled down, hearing contestants belt out Stevie Wonder at every toilet door. I remember seeing Sylvia sitting on a bench with her contemporary Nurul, having a conversation about what it takes to be an idol and just how psyched they would be if they could make it past the F1 weekend where they would free tickets to the F1Rocks concerts. I remember seeing Sezairi, walking around wardrobe with his signature glasses, lost in the music. I remember watching the faces of the other contestants as they poured through what the New Paper and Today newspapers had to say about their performance.

It brought back many memories of my own time in Singapore Idol. The raw excitement of the Idol theme as we stand on the stage with Gurmit in the wings ready to announce us in. The feeling that as a singer you can be the master of your own fate for once and ride on the publicity train in its full glory of marketing and glitz. I had that strange flashback while standing backstage with the sound crew in the Indoor Stadium, minutes before the announced this season’s winner of Singapore Idol.

One of the guys in charge of the mixers turned to me and asked, “Sezairi of Sylvia?” I shrugged partially out of political correctness and partially out of confusion. It was really a toss up.

 It was the question on everyone’s lips. No one could deny the absolute fan base of Sezairi and the fact that two times before, Malay male idols had been voted as Singapore’s choice. However, the streets were abuzz with the possibility of a female idol for once, seeing that so many had come close to it in years before with the likes of Olinda Cho and Jasmine Tye. Personally, I was wondering exactly how this was going to play out. Did the fact that Charice Pempengo the pint sized Philipino belter had swung her support behind Sylvia Ratonel as being a fellow “pinoy” have any impact? Did the individual vocal performances manage to re-distribute the voting numbers? Was the impeccable choice of wardrobe a possible swing factor? Or if we are going to be frank about this, did race and sex have anything to do with this?

Recent figures released by KPMG state that Singapore Idol winner Sezairi Sezali received 61% of total votes cast against hot favourite Sylvia Ratonel. Would it be safe to say then that the Malay community backed Sezairi as they did with Hady and Taufik and that the Philipino community could not match the en masse sms behemoth of Sezairi’s fans? Could this be a case of girls versus boys, where enraptured teenage girls hungry for Facebook stardom sms wildly for their favourite male contestants while female contestants have an uphill task of trying to win votes? Noone can say I don’t know what I’m talking about. I was there, believe me. I know how hard it is as a girl to appeal to the sms voters without stooping so low by making that silly “call me” gesture with my hands.

However, must Sezairi’s win be emotionally contested just because he was the third Malay boy to win Idol? Shouldn’t his musical abilities stand on their own merit? On the flipside, is it really such an injustice that Sylvia did not win? Judging by the eager looks of the record companies and artiste management agencies who were bustling about her at the post-Idol party in the Indoor Stadium, she should be getting an offer soon.

I remember giving an interview about what the Singapore Idol means to me. I said that the Singapore Idol is Singapore’s musical ambassador to the world. Although he is a close friend, when I look at Taufik singing in Indonesia and Malaysia, I feel proud to know that this was one of Singapore’s working musicians who made it big. Just before Hady was announced the Asian Idol, I was working the late night shift at 938LIVE where I read the news. It was almost surreal. Here was my friend on TV in Indonesia, fighting amongst the best singers in Asia and I was waiting with bated breath together with the news journalists to announce his victory on radio, live as it happened.

Singapore Idol was not just a passing phase to me; it’s become an indelible part of my life. It helped me to become a radio DJ on 938Live and then having my own daily show on Symphony 92.4fm. It helped me begin my career as a producer and director. As a singer, it made me a headline at the Esplanade and pushed me overseas to perform for such dignitaries as the King of Thailand! The best part of it is, I never even won the competition and hard work, luck and some very supportive people helped to open those doors for me. Such is the luck I hope Sylvia will find.

In Sezairi’s case, his predecessors have set the benchmark of excellence.

Now that the hoopla of reality TV is over, the hard work of being a bonafide singer and performer can start.  

Mathilda De Silva has been singing in bands and acoustic duo since she was 12! She also performed at this season’s Singapore Idol grand finals.  So when it comes to music, she knows what she is talking about. What has she been up to since her time at Idol? She has been a DJ, an actress, a producer and of course singing.  Way to go girl!

Does Paul think Singapore Idol is a reality TV program, a singing competition or a competition to find the perfect package to market?

Haha let’s keep this short, but starting statement, I guess the music industry has already become such a business, that to say making it “big”, especially in a commercial sense purely based on talent, is very far fetched. Miley Cyrus, or more so, Disney stars, are a prime example. They are packaged as teen idols, they have good voices, so that could be considered talent. However, they are produced to look and act the way they do by big time music players who want to appeal to a mass public. Its just interesting how music is supposed to be a form of expression and a way of connecting to people, which is why music is universal, but one could say its sad that now it is so marketed to fit an appeal, rather than the other way round. I guess its another question of differentiating singers who like to perform, and raw musicians, people who write their music, or poets? But let’s not digress I could go on forever.

 When it comes to the case of Singapore Idol, we see the commercialism factor come into play. Interesting to note though, the show works two ways. You find the most appealing singer thanks to votes, and whoever it is, because he or she is so popular already, you get to package them the best way deemed fit by the music industry, so it’s a perfect combo. However, interesting to note, you already get a diverse number of singers/musicians on the show, and while the show progresses, from what I gather through personal experience, they package you more and more as the show progresses, testing your popularity factor. So I guess to answer the question more, it would lean toward more of producing the perfect package at the end of the show more than finding one? Hmmmmm.

 I’ve seen many singers and musicians on the show, all with their own flair and own taste for music get controlled by producers to an extent. Its inevitable cos you could go by mummy’s old line “mummy knows what’s best for you”. And to get “big” in this industry, even the best musicians with original content need SOME form of marketing. More questions do arise over and over. I could go forever. LOL.

To another time, happy new year. J peace out nig-gas.

Thumbs up to *drumroll* Paul Twohill, the cool dude with the famous fringe. Why he is familiar? He claimed 4th spot in the 2^nd season of Singapore idol, he is now in Ngee Ann poly studying Mass Communications. Only 21 and he already has a single called “Here I am” which was released just last year.